Nowadays, there are a lot of smart, charming, beautiful, but completely lonely women. They say about them: "everything is with her, but there is no pair." It would seem that it hinders to establish a strong relationship, the most ordinary girl?
There are people for whom loneliness is an ideal decision and a conscious choice, but there are very good reasons for this. This will be discussed below.
For a long time, loneliness was a sign of abnormality, some kind of defectiveness. For example, for a girl, the real punishment was considered to be an old maid. These ladies were subjected to universal ridicule and pity. Currently, a single woman does not cause such excitement and surprise, on the contrary, some admire her and even envy her. But not everything is as good as it seems, according to psychologists, the reluctance to start a family is a kind of signal about the presence of problems, mostly psychological.
Spiritual Origins:
- too high or very low self-esteem - "I am the best", "I am not beautiful, no one is looking at me";
- feminism education - "I can count on myself and do not need men's handouts";
- child obsessed - "Motherhood - this is what a woman should do," "A child needs an ideal father."
Consider the main reasons why a woman chooses loneliness.
Bad experience
Many women deliberately avoid serious relationships and believe that it is better to be alone than with anyone. Why? Most often, these are the consequences of a previous relationship. Disappointment, bitterness, resentment - all this interferes with trusting and falling in love again. Women are afraid to step on the "same rake" and experience all the pain again.
When fear reaches its highest limit, the woman sees no other option but loneliness. Moreover, over time, she enters into courage and does not understand why people even start a family. It is much easier not to report to anyone, to devote time only to yourself, to travel, to develop, to experience only joy and no sadness.
Roots from childhood
The phenomenon of a “life scenario” has long been known, according to which the future life of a child depends precisely on the parents. The father is the first man with whom the girl interacts, it depends on him how her female happiness will develop in the future. If the relationship in the family did not develop, the father was a tyrant or an alcoholic, then in the future the girl may treat men with great distrust and apprehension. Children's injuries are very deep in our subconscious mind and prevent us from living a full life.
You should not expect good consequences from excessive custody in the family. Such women are in no hurry to leave their parental home, start a family, give birth to children, generally achieve any goals, since they do not see the point in this, they are already good. In fact, in their 30s, they think and act like teenagers.
Increased requirements
If there is an opportunity, ask a single woman about what, in her opinion, is the main thing in a relationship. Surely in response you will hear a long list of masculine qualities: caring, generous, attentive, attractive, with a sense of humor, true. You will hear what a man should do in a relationship, but not her. Some women only want to receive, use, enjoy, but give nothing in return.
In addition, a girl can create for herself a certain image of a man without flaws, which has a wide range of advantages and lack of disadvantages. In the real world, it is almost impossible to find, and if a girl does not change her beliefs, then she will be disappointed.
Unwillingness to be with an unworthy man
Only with experience does a woman understand how short-sighted and dangerous it is to give her life to a person whom you do not know at all. She understands what is most important for her in a relationship, and which man can make her happy.
Self-sufficiency
A successful lady is visible from afar. She is well-groomed, content with life, confident in her abilities, sociable and has others to herself. She respects herself, lives in harmony with nature and enjoys every moment, she cannot be forgotten, she leaves a mark in the soul of every person. For happiness, she needs to always develop and be free, which family life with her husband cannot give, so loneliness is the best option for her.
Lonely woman, sees many advantages for herself:
- no need to adjust;
- You can go on dates;
- invest in yourself;
- do sport;
- learn something new;
- sleep as much as you want;
- take care of yourself;
- perfect house order;
- absolute freedom;
- have time for a career.
But behind the perfect picture, despair and longing can be hidden, and even a happy girl can grab a loved one.
According to sociologists, a woman chooses loneliness because of fear of difficulties. It is much easier for her to be alone, not to stand all day at the stove and to nurse a child. This behavior indicates the unwillingness to take responsibility, and sometimes infantilism. These beliefs prevent a woman from understanding the true essence of marriage, she avoids problems and believes: "Since the relationship cannot be ideal, it is better to be alone."
The main danger of loneliness is the addiction of a woman to such a model of life, she ceases to need care, attention, and also in any relationship. In addition, over time, communication skills with men are lost, so if a woman wants to start a family, she will not be so easy to do.
Difficulties may be:
- in a society of couples - gradually all friends start families and a lonely woman is less and less invited to visit;
- for household damage - then you have to ask for help from relatives, a neighbor or call an employee from the company;
- with high sexual needs - when there is no permanent partner, then it is difficult to count on regularity in sexual affairs, especially if you really want to do it.
- in communication with family (regular questions about marriage).
Ultimately, it is important that each person achieve happiness, and happiness is a relative concept, and each has its own.
